The 33% Majority
The 33% Majority

Episode 32 · 6 months ago

Ep. 32 - Sincerely Sorry the Sequel (2 Sorry, 2 Furious)

ABOUT THIS EPISODE

With our tails between our legs, we present to you, the 32th episode of The 33% Majority. It's so very late, but it's here. We hope you forgive us.

In this week’s episode, your 3 favourite sorry boys will each spend their 15 minutes of fame discussing the biggest mistakes we've ever made, who (out of Alex and Tom) is th better friend, and yucky London occurences, respectively.

Also we come to you, hat in hand, to ask for your help to get this show in front of people that you think might like to listen, so please share this episode with a friend, family member, colleague, or even a stranger on public transport. If you do, let us know, and we’ll shout you out on air, and make you an honorary board member for The 33% Inc.

Happy Birthday to Tom Because we forgot. Happy Birthday to Tom Because we forgot. Happy Birthday to Tom we forgot. Happy Birthday to Tom as we forgot because we've got hey, we did a bad job of Tommy's birthday. We did a real bad bad job to our friend. Yeah, I don't think it was our hundred percent best moment. Hello, and welcome back to another episode of the thirty three percent majority, a talk show. We all find three friends fighting for their fifteen minutes of fame. I'm your host, m six Pozzi, PAN head screw a to stainless Alex. spring thoughte, I think you'll find I'm your host, t six, Talk Star on a rat. Sha Ashley Whole Gone To. What kind of fastener are you? I'm Tom. She's just told the best fastener the glue that binds us. Quick dive straight into an anecdote. The day it works, we goes, no, it's me, it's me. I don't know Alex Work and I work for an electronics company and sometimes we make full assemblies of things. So I'm looking at a keyboard now, whireless keyboard, and it's got keys and buttons and they'll be a circuit board in there in batteries and we'll make the whole thing. And I was asking a colleague of minus, all, hey, Simon, what screws do you think I need for this assembly? It was like, you know, there are so many fascinating types of fasteners, and then went into a full fifteen minute long conversation with me about the variety of fasteners. There are screws, nuts, washers and and those were the things. Wow, amazing. Thank you for that. Okay, my turn for an ant anecdote now. Shure, I did a scam on Jeff and his good book company. They gave me three books when I got audible, Uh Huh, and then I said, Jeff, I don't want my audible account anymore. So they said we'll give you one more book if you stay, and I said I can, I'll take the other book, and then I canceled my account. Listen to all my four books, and then I realized that I wanted to maybe buy myself another book, specifically a book about the office, the US version of the office. So I loved on to my udible account and for reinstating my account, they were like hey, Tom, welcome back, two more books for you. I said, thank you very much, Jeff, for you good book. And also, though, I've realized that I have four books here that I've read. Is there anything that we can do about getting those out of my library? Uh Huh, and Jeff, in response to me, said, Oh yeah, definitely, even if you've listened to them, you can return them and get a full like book token math. So now Tommy. Now, Tommy was left with six tokens. So I spent all my six tokens on all the books that I wanted, on all the audible books I wanted to listen. Are you you one alf, all of the Harry potters? All this is the thing. I then said to Jeff, Jeff, I've got to cancel my account now because I don't want to pay you for this service. And Jeff said, what about one more books? And I said, all right, okay, I love that one. Tommy is me, Jeffrey, and I've got so many of these things dangle about my factory, come out my little ware House. Know what happened? Jeff be's as the people please of that year, is going broke to supply Tom's book. I can't afford to maintain it. Tom You're going to ruin his love has in Finny Book Tom I need updates on this. How far I push it without that? And then whether you receive the bill for the thousand books you've mastered to come will be there. You could set up a yearly breut. I couldn't all an audio library. I should just start playing the books on this podcast. We can have in. You can got a really high colling Mike. You can just start like your own. There's a small book company. I will repeat every word that said on the all night and we'll that was my Amazon, my Amazon nickdote. Actually. Do you have any? Don't like to you'd like to give to our ears? I do so. As you both know, I started a new job and I'm really enjoying it's really fun. I spend my day is helping people try ski boots on, talking to about snowboarding. Bicycle Shit do they's a fun fact. I didn't know that. What the Bicycle Shit? I just didn't know that they did that, and only when they breath. And I make in consonance pads for but no, I don't do that. Don't get any sidetracked. So yeah, I had a lovely lady come in who saw my bicycle, which is an old orange road bike, and she went that's lovely. My son would like that, and I went, well, your son could buy it if he wants and then she said,...

...well, you already builds bicycles and she put me into contact with him and he's coming to my workshop on Saturday to trade some bike bits. And this all sprung from a ten minute conversation about bicycles with an old lady at work and it was fucking awesome. Ashley, I feel like if, if in my workplace as an electronic boy, if somebody called me I was like our, Hey, I really want this circuit bill making. I was like hey, hey, fuck these guys, don't worry about this company. It's all right, I'll make it for you. Just sell to the direct I'm not saying I'm not selling anybody work. You work for a read you work for a bicycle retailer. It's when he came in, was like hello, one bicycle please, you said Down't yeah, well, this one, this one that profits me. Didn't profit me at all. It's a nice thing I'm doing. What you've done, Ashley, is not only have you undercutting corporate it and offered your services outside of your retail stores services, but you've also outed yourself on a podcast about it. But exactly, it's as if one of us like went to work, like we do this as a hobby. It's like if one of US went to work and like recorded a podcast, like for work or something. Yeah, it's like undercutting your business and then using it as a format to advertise your own work. If only one of us was doing and we could put the finger to him and move it away from me. Only there was one of us that have done something like that this podcast host ship. I mean, it wouldn't have been me. Shush, I think we need to shush up out this. Let's move on. Oh, never mind listening audience. HMM, thirty three percent of this podcast has informed us that we're not allowed to speak about that on the air. Guys, did sign your NDA's? Okay, please don't breach them. But anyway, moving away from that whole mess, yeah, I just thought it was really nice that I made a friend at work who's grandson or son, I don't remember which is. It's going to come and take like some old bike bits from me. How Nice is that? How cute, very cute. I've just realized that my segment relies on the introduction of an anecdote and I wasn't expected to do my anecdote that one. I was expected to a different one. When you can do so, I am going to be your host. Alex Spring thought. I'm going now our shit. I do anything to say. I just have nothing to say, and then I'll let you go into your anecdote. That leads into your segment. We haven't started the timer yet. I have a prediction to make. Can you just take your ear phones out and move away from your mic? Yeah, I'll do that right now. I am out. Yeah, Tom, we've gotten an established Canon where we where we go into a break room or something when we need to talk in private. Okay, there's break room. I don't know when to come back and my prediction pass. Get away from the door. I'm film out. My prediction. Is that my prediction? I'm on the outside. Look actually, fuck say Gone Tom, Tom with my ear phone not. Oh my fucking God, Jesus, H fucking Christ Ashley is going to introduce his segment by saying that he's going to rip the band aid of host ship away and the host. That's my prediction. Me When I can come back. Oh my God, I'm back, I'm home. Hello, that hey, wow, that was a lot of work, Thomas. It really fucking wasn't it wasn't worth it. Diminishing returns. Did I ruin it? No, yes, yes, noowed by Alex yes, and yes, but I am now your host. I will rip the band aid of Hot ship off. Thoma, fucked it. That's what I's my saying. I know it's me, Alexander Spring thought, Alexander Jeffrey Spring Thorpe, your host of the podcast that we do. So the other day it was, ever, a frosty and icy outside, and my lovely wife, who's full up to the brim of a baby, was like, Hey, your car's shit, go warm it up. So it did. Ferrous. I was like, you know what, that's not something I would normally do, but that one is a tremendous idea. So I went, started up the state of the artist and micro now should pair and away close the door. Went inside five minutes, had a cup of coffee. Lovely came out to the car and it was all defrosted. This was such an excellent idea of an amazing what an amazing woman she is. So forward thinking. Then I tried to open the door and the stay of the artist and Micra was just like security, must lock it and I've only got one key and it was in the ignition and the car was still running on the drive, blocking the other car in...

...superb it is the is the MICRA are called. Well, it is now because I had to put the window through. For any American arson it's what that means. Is he done? Punched it in. He punched a window. I didn't. I didn't punch it a window. That's the thing. I've watched videos on the line of people punching windows through. HMM and Dolly Geef. You got to give it some otherwise your hand just bounces all the way off and it's look glass. From watching these videos, glasses really strong. That's what I've at least it was in my little nuggin. I've heard. I was like fuck it, I'll get myself, get myself a hammer. Okay, Oh yeah, good eye. Didn't I thought ham much stronger than glass? Definitely. I didn't factor in the fact that people are using their fleshy meat hands to try and pop through windows with him and I was using a thing made of metal. But I still hit it with the same Gusto. Right, okay, no, so the hammer went through the glass no problems at all, as did my hand. I got caught in the crossfire quite severely. All of my hambones were out, it was blood all over the place and my hand still isn't quite right yet, and this was two weeks ago. Right, so my segment is about accident, mistake. Whoops, ee Otto's that we've done. Okay, that's really cute. That is we talked about. Whoops, see our oh mistakes. That what we've done. But you know that you can, like break a car window with so little effort. You can like take your shoe off, put a screw on the corner of the window and just tap the screw. You could do that. You don't need like to risk any amount of like health and safety. What one and another thing. I was like, I'll grab a hammer, because that's the health and safety thing. I'm not touching it with my hand, I'll just knock it with a hammer. That's the smart thing to do. I wish you just did it with so much fucking force. Ash. I tell you what, if you're so smart, right, why don't you invent time? Travel and go back in time and tell Alex that. Then we won't have my stock. We won't up much to talk about on the podcast if I do that. I can't go around faxing all the problem any nothing to talk about. HOW WOULD WE MOAN? Okay, safety time levels. Got Loads of problems with that. There'll be so many accidental whops your os in that I don't think it's a good idea. HMM. Okay, Tommy, what accidental whoops here Ottos? Have you done? You guys both row ride road motorcycles. Yeah, yeah, yeah, stands, but yes, yeah, I told you my stories about how I had two of them that I never actually got to properly own. Right, HMMP those do sound like by also problems. Yeah, but I also had a moped that does seem more your speed. Thirty two miles and forty miles an hour top speed. So it was that forcy, the heady heights of a sports moped? Yeah, it was forty when I first got it and then it's sort of just like slowly declined as time went on, like a metaphor for life. Your ponies escaped. Yeah, I used to ride around on my moped with people that had motorbikes and I liked to think that mine was a motorbike as well. So I would constantly try and, you know, get my knee down and get very close to the pavement. On a MOPAD, that's not great because you had knees tend to be behind the bars. They're tom it's also what I would do is I would like stick mark, stick my knee very very wide out, try and like get it touch the ground. Now the probably is laughing, but I've seen him do that on big bikes. So carry up right. So problem is is that when you're on a when you're on a motorcycle, all of the the parts of the motorcycle are like, I'm not sure how to describe this, there under you right, whereas like with a mote in the way, but with a motor with a moped, you're sort of slightly surrounded by by moped. You are what I'm trying to say are you are as step in no pad. Yeah, so se bucket of motorcycle. That's exactly what I'm trying to say. So I went around around about and it was very quiet and I thought that I would try and get as low as as humanly possible. But what happened was before my knee touched the floor, the fairings of my moped touched the floor. Oh yuck. Oh Yeah, oh, that's my my Bi'm go all tight. So then my moped did a what I can only describe as like an involuntary bunny hop and start used, refused to have me aboard it anymore, and that was my whoopsie. The good news there's there. You succeeded. You succeeded in getting your knee down, and the rest of you as well, Tom I know over it. Yeah, exactly. I got my whole body down and the best motorcyclist tell me aim for the stars because if you fail, you still with the moon or something. I don't really know how that goes. Aim for the stars and you'll still suffocating the vacuum of space. They the one. I did something similar. I think your brother was on the back ash it was still really nervous about cornering, so I went round a roundabout again and again and again at again and again. lost.

I just fucking get used to it. And he was getting really, really cross at me because I was going around and rather circles really quickly and I was ill. May just get used to it. Just touch the floor, just relax. And then he and then he did and I was like fuck, just reached out and just touched the road. That's that's the problem with Nathan is he does follow orders, but like to a t. your fault, but that was act. That wasn't really an accidental up to you, Ott Oh. That was just a shit sweet. I did one accidental upsee what? Oh, on the way to work the other day. Oh yeah, so again featuring my nineteen and nineteen sixty something. So it's old and the brakes didn't work and I didn't know the breakes didn't work because they worked when I set off. Did you buy it new? All right, fuck, you real tired of these fucking old jokes. It's probably due to your age, Ashley. Yeah, I'm real tired all the time these days. Yes, I'll, I'm not even thirty anyway. I'm nearly close, not long for this, closer than us. So I'm going down the hill on the way to my work, which is at the bottom of a very substantial long ass fucking hell doesn't Ikea next to it, so it's busy all the time and I'm blasting down the hill on my bicycle and I get to the roundabout and I start to try and slow down and my rear break cable just disconnect or oh yeah, Brown moment, because I see it, I see the table drop out of the handlebar and I just think, well, I've only got a front break and it is like a very sharp front break because it's old and if I touch it it looks. So that's not an option. I can't I don't want to lock the front end and go across a like and just eat shit. Did you do that thing where you like Ram your foot in between the frame and the rotatings? I'm not that fucking smile. I didn't even think of that. Like I wish I'd thought of that, because I didn't. What I did was I went for the fucking roundabout like a gang. So I thought so, yeah, I check left, check right. Don't know why I check left, because you know I'm coming. Traffic comes to the right around about in England. So I blast across and somebody nearly pulled out on me and so I oich the front break because at that point I was like well, I've done it, now, I've had it. I no longer carrying as much speed. So I just fucking oint that it's gonna hurt one of two ways, rather like I'll go ahead over ours or I'll get hit by a car. So I chose to Oit the front break. The back end lifted and I basically kissed the side of a panel van and I was I was sure of this panel van by about maybe fucking seven inches, like in are and he beats which I was. I was like the little bit ineffective beeping after I've nearly fucking made out with your van. HMM, really is an accidental loopsie, who it was the most accidental? See what are the week? That counts for sure, Alex. shall I tell ash about my biggest school a whoops I. I'll please do. Yes, please, Thomas, yes, please. So I was at I was a drama boy at school. Ashley can amounted me. I liked the performing arts and I got on with my performing arts teachers very, very well. We had to male drama teachers and one female drama teacher and on one break time Alex and I were walking through the hallowed halls of our secondary school and I saw my my female drama teacher, and I thought, given that she was both a performer and a performing arts teacher that doing a comedy sketch about some kind of dramatic performance would be really funny, because she was a fun, funny teacher. So I decided what would be a good idea would be to reenact that famous scene from the titanic, not the one where Jack drawls and naked, the one where they do say that's a crime. Yeah, that's it. Yeah, the one where they stand at the head of the boat and they've got their arms out and Jacky grab a wasted you. Now, I didn't grab a Waiste, I've just put her arms up like and I and I sung the song and the Lady Arts Teacher said, well, I think he was trying to fuck me. So got me suspended, and that was my biggest school trying to have intercourse with her. I was absolutely one hundred percent trying to recreate a scene from a movie with a drama teacher. It. That sounds like what you might say if you and the erection was nothing to do with it, officer, was nothing. It was like they're not mutually exclusive, right, okay, you can like could have had one because of it, or it could have been no, and yeah, I got suspended and cried in front of my head teacher when he said I couldn't come to school anymore. Tommy, Tommy, the precious baby. Yeah, are you've just reminded me. It's so drama teachers, if you've ever lived in we you've lived in Sleeford, Alex Tim. Have you been to Sleeford a couple of times, unfortunately? Yeah, okay, so we're sage George's the academy there, which is a shit school, by the way. Apart from some of two of the teachers are really cool.

The rest of them probably still pricks. But yeah, I am on my bicycle again and I am riding along no handed and I see my drama teacher and the music teacher in a car and so I wave and I'm waving nonhanded because I'm trying to show off, and I ride straight into a fucking lamp post. Well done, your shit at riding bicycles. Actually, no, no, no, I'm great at riding bicycles. They things are just in the way. Ash. Did you say you waved at them? No handedly. No, I was right. That would be nice, just doublehanded wave. I don't like the fact that that's exactly how I probably sounded my my impression that I was doing there when I was shouting hello, was of somebody, let's say, like imitating a fish on dry land, like hello, that's my no handed wave, hello, just sort of vibrating vigorously. I has an accidental oopsie. What over the teacher, HMM, can't remember from ever, said I'll school named before Tom that's this. Could get incriminated. Music teacher. Not say the name of it. Okay, all the nameless. Yeah, let's just hope we haven't done before. The music teacher was a lovely woman whose surname was the same as our male pe teacher, because, yes, that's the marriage that they've done, all right, and Wan't I was I was having a ferociously bad day and I was ever upset and I wasn't in my lesson because I was full to the room of hormones and sorrow. This lady music teacher sits down with me. I was how Alec Come on, it's all all right. What's going on? I'm not I won't tell you. I refuse. Hey, hey, they're a little bread. What about if I tell you about my life? But we some kind of mutual empathetic understanding and we can share our ways together. And then she told me about how she was divorcing the be teacher and I would know what I feel a lot better. Thank you very much. Goodbye. told him all right, I think May. I think that's actually fair. I think that's how we found out. I'm just to talk to a fourteen year old and he's convinced me it's over. His outlook on life has convinced me to leave you. Sorry, have a good basketball lesson and for him, and we're going to be doing a titanic reenacting later on. You can go watch if you here's one birth but Beth, when she was fairly new to drive and she had a Vaux all courser banging or and she was reverse it, reversing into a parking space and she scrapes a post with the left side of the car and there was a deep scratch it in all the way down the left outside of a car. She was like, Oh shit, I'll fuck's say, like new car, new to drive in. It really put her off. She was I fuck, I'm not reversing into this space, I'll pull it forwards so she can turns around. Came into the space and scrapes the the exact same post, but on the other side to everything. Symmetry. That's fine, I'm that's we see a picture of this later on. Not for the listeners, not for you guys, stop listening, but if I've got one, just for US podcast boys. But that's been my segment about accidental oop. See who's thank you so much for listening. Wow, you timed that so fucking well. I just got a good, great time and went. That was yeah, fucking incredible. That was great. HMM. Wow, okay, well, we'll go to Yucky town then, shall we? Let's head to Yucky town. Yeah, we'll come back everyone. I'm sorry time, you know, we're already in it and I got really excited. It's okay. You were just singing afterwards. Is Fine. Welcome back, everybody, to your favorite segment between segments. Burn. What the fuck, Chennery wow of the park, Thomas Jee, to have you back, all of that nasty jaunty stank. Absolutely welcome, everybody. Indeed. It was still regular is it's sticking between segments and what the frictionary is. This is this is one where what we do is we take an entry from the urban dictionary and we try and figure out what it means and then I tell what that. Tell you all what Fret finition is. What the Frick? What the FRICKTY FRICK FRAC, snicker snack, crack Jack, cracked back, Daddy, paddy, work, give a dog a bone. Is the SHITES. Yeah, is this shit? Isn't that was ant called back, wasn't it? Okay, sure, I just do it the entry for today's pineapple. I don't want to really. I think I know what this one is. Yeah, Tom that's a tomas, a tropical fruit. I know that much makes your come. He's taste better, gives you delicious come.

That's what I was thinking. Yeah, it does tasty stuff to your lady bits or your man stuff. I've never seen not tasty lady bits though. HMM, bat trees, though. That doesn't make tasty lady bits. What? Why would you need batchies for that? No, no, I was saying that like sometimes it can be like battery's or like a pocket full of coppers. Maybe. No, no, experience with that. Okuk, you full of coppers, you reach into your pocket and it goes well, well, well, what's all this? A crime and all of a sudden, the change in your pockets screaming at to any American listens. Listeners, I ment like copper change is in like the the one peas and two peas that we have here in this country. That's right, tom it is about it is about bloody time the coppers changed, doesn't it? Good grief. I'm not getting. I won't make comment because we know how I feel on that easy the one the sponge Robert Square nickers lived in, is it? I'll because it's under the sea. Yeah, I see, know, it's because it's fucking pineapple. You Pineapple. Oh, it sounds like an insult. Oh No, hang on, try call someone and call someone it. It's nice. It feels good as she fuck him, pineapple. That's like good of all that did hurt me because the spikes. Oh, I wonder actually, Alexey, you've just given me it. You know, people used to say the men who had like really, really short shaved sides of their head like going are high up, and then they had that sort of like quiff at the top, and they used to call that ice kind of well peeky blinders esque, but with its spikey on top. Yeah, so I wonder whether, like a pineapple, somebody that's a pineapple has a pineapple haircut. It's like maybe they have a rounder shape, like an Alex face. Is it when ladies they do like a bobble thing in the hair, you know the ones when we do? Yeah, they get the hair with a bobble in it, and then there's sometimes like stray bits that come out. I think that, yeah, it could be that apple. Maybe pineapple head. I'm stick into my guns. I think it's when someone's got tasty come you just look up and you go pineapple, fine apple. I find just being a scrubby tropical fruit and nothing more. Okay, the answer is pineapple. Spongebob's House. I actually says SpongeBob sets the point there sure, like yes, well, dove spine, Spongebob's house is a pineapple under the sea. That makes sense. And Night Trotopia posted that on the fourth of April two thousand and seventeen. So that he made a late joke. There's almost as old as me. That's that was the high of spongebarb I reckon that was some of his later stuff was great, but the lect is early albums. But he got a bit, you know, absorbit in yellow and porous. Is He that's why I've heard one of the other definitions says pineapple a code word to replace the phrase. That's what she said, fuck in order to avoid alerting unwanted participants. NEW FEMALE CO worker at Demonstration. This is my first time, so take it slow. MALE CO worker to other male co worker. Pineapple, and I hate that. Why do you need to discount somebody out of a joke so badly that you have a code word but what is essentially a shit joke anyway? And that one was, submittedly, my very Michael got joke. Oh, Alex, we did it at the same time. That's what she said. That's been my urban what the frictionary and I really like this said. I like know. Hang on. I love this bit of the podcast right now where it's no was the host, no one's the host. It's this is peas in our time limbo. This is the most Christmasy time of the part. I feel weightless right now, PE, some monk's men, you've so relaxing being here. You know when you flip a coin and for that brief sec it is both heads the coin and tails and hovers in the air. It's not moving downwards or upwards. It's stationary. What's that moment? Call in an it, but the Ark and a throw, where it's zenith, the Zenith of the throw. That's the word I was looking for. It's at it. That's what we're in. We're in the zenith. Yeah, the Zenith of the PODCAST. Guys, actually, hello, should we just hello, welcome to Kenneth Time thanksgiving. Whilst we're in Kenneth's zenith, should we actually just take a moment to, you know, US and the audience just take a moment collect ourselves, maybe think of something that we're grateful for? It's not thanksgiving, but why not, which is say something that we're happy to just say some let's just say something nice about each other. Let's do that. I think that's nice. Yeah, can I not go first? Tom? I think you're a very kind friend, because I'm just gonna slight this in, because any excuse to talk about it. Tom Tom gave me many thousands of Lendo bucks so I could buy and not stately on this unlike crew. Yes, literally yesterday,...

...he did it. Now I've got a new car or thanks to Tom and his benevolence. You're welcome. Love you. I didn't get a new car and now I think Tom's a bad friend. Now this is the nice time. Actually, you do have, you do have to give the Tom the money back. Oh, yeah, no, Tom, yeah, I do twenty four hours. Lend me any money. He breaks legs, I will not really hate listeners. I've got a new car. It's got a new car, Alex, he's got a fast wagon, and I would like to say that Tom has been a kind and benevolent ear as I move forward into kind of writing more for local magazines. He proofread my article for me and it I submitted it and it's being published, and I credit that to Tom and his excellent master reading. Good friend. Thanks very much for saying some about let's just carry on saying Nice things about time, nice things about Tom. Tom's a good friend. He's missing half a tip, but apart from that, I'm not missing half of it. I'm missing one whole one, sorry, half of his tits. That makes more sense. That's better. Ye, but yeah, it toimes a good friend. Alex, not so much. I haven't got really much nice to say about no, let's just keep saying Nice things about Tom. I he's got a dog that's got a nine foot vertical leap which, before Tom got the dog, he couldn't walk and Tom touched him. And now nine foot vertical leap. Yes, and ammost a video of that total post, a video of that instagram and also a video of his vertical leap. A good. I have the one nice to say about Alex as well. Actually, Alex has got a really flash car. Guys, the fucking car my friend Alex, so it's so good. The nicest thing that you could say about Alex was his taste in in buying motor vehicles. I love it. Might my nice thing to say about Ashley is the ash you are passionate about so many things, to a fault. No, not like that. Wasn't even what I was going to say. You're passionate about so many things that impact so many people, and I think that your empathy is something that a lot of people could aspire to have. That's my nice thing. I would say. Boys, ALEX MMM has good beard. He does have phenomenal good beard. Being so we got kedded sales. Now it's getting weird over ithead. It's got a real fucking weird atmosphere. This bitch was nice for a bit and then it then it became strange. It was nice for a bit, then it got weird. Yeah, I would like to tear away the bandages of non host ship. I didn't do it that time. I'd I was listening. I lie about not listening. Tom. How many Sheba in news do I owe you for that? How many are? You've got like two million, haven't you? So Alex has got a fair few she bit in new coin. I bought three million of them. How many would you like for your better I would like one ship coin, please. Okay, not and you actually introduce your segment. I'm going to figure out how to do this. Yeah, sure. So I have a segment idea that I wanted to do last week, but chaos occurred and we did a car episode instead. So I'd like to offer you both the chance to prove which one of you is the better friend. Oh my God, Oh my God, what an Intro, one intro to your segment, ash that we accidentally did for you. Yeah, you're very welcome. So I would like to now I'm going to ask some questions and you're going to take turns answering them for each other. So I will ask a question about Tom Alex, you will answer and if you are correct, you'll get a point. Okay, goold grief. Okay, okay, so we're going to find out who's the better friend to one another. But just me and Tommy. Yeah, to do with me, mate, like I don't want my life. Okay, fucking spewing. Do I fucking get beyond this? Right. So the first question is, Alex. what's Tom's favorite color? Blue? I'd like a more specific what kind of blue? Like a baby blue, a royal blue, Aqua Marine, choking and it. I need to get my wife on the phone. Go, as I know, there's no more than what. There's no no one. Blue and white, blue, down up without lying, and I'll know if you fucking do, you little bastard. What's your favorite color, Babe? Is Blue. Fuck, I'm a BLUETOB. Do you have a favorite flavor of blue? Probably you prefer, I think. Personally, I don't like a dark blue. Sounds like racism to me. But okay, so I think an even take. Yeah, here dark blue. I don't like a like royal blue is Yuck and reminds me of a school school uniform. Yeah, yeah, so, yeah, what strong star? I like. This sounds actually I'm glad Tom. HMM. When's Alex's birthday? January? Yep, one thousand...

...nine hundred and ninety eight. Yep, the date of which, Aha, don't fucking Google it. I'll know if you do. I'm not going to fuck that birth beyond the incident. What? You're a famous celebrity. I don't know if you know, but this Hendel jet has been asking me about you for weeks. Mr Spring kids, birthday please, Alexa. So I've got like I've got like two in my head. Spit one out. Oh, part of me wants to say the thirty first. Did it did a little boot is my first answ I'm afraid. Alec No, No, No, no, twelve, twelve, no, no, I've got a twenty, twenty two, twenty two, twenty two, twenty second, except twenty two. Alex birthday to a second January. The first answering, coffer. Okay, I'm pretty up sad. That's quite frank, and that you. First of January is my son's expected birth but he will be fashionably late, as all spring funkles are. So that was obviously what I had on the mine. I check the pre order and that's that's the delivery day, apparently. Oh No, they're in the area today. Alex. yeah, what is Tom's favorite cereal? Tom, think about if it's not already, it needs to be. It's lion cereal, Lion Bar. You got me there. You've honestly it. Yeah, you've done it. I only I think the only reason I know about that is because it's mine too, but I think Tom introduced me to it. Okay, we're gonna need to get stupid specific for these as, although, although we are a although we are thick and fast as a trio, Thomas and I have no I've known Thomas Longer than I've known anybody. Yeah, I'm I don't want to say I'm jealous, but you know so, Tom. Yes, what is Alex has least favorite food? Whoa, you fuck her? Yeah, specific now, your bastards. I've got one in mind. Okay, you have thirty seconds from now tell you what for, for honesty sake, I'm going to message it to Ashley. Yes, please. Oh, that's okay, idea. Actually, I really like that. Is is interesting. Is it a BRUSS SPROUT? It is not, and I have to take you first answer. No point for you. It's a Kiwi that's that's very that's very oddly specific. I don't know that. I don't know why that would have ever come up in our friendship, but it's say, yeah, I fucking Hate Kiwi's not New Zealand. Is The thirty two percent is not a New Zealand and land hating podcast. I think I'm allergic to Kiwis. They make my mouth feel all allergic. You eat the Kiwi, the Kiwi eats you back. Yeah, pretty much. It's spicy. Okay, fir play, but now these are all marriage ones. I don't ask you about that. When was your first kiss? Okay, when was I firs? Answer? Probably the day we met. Yeah, literally, I've guessed Alex a few times. I can tell them. Yeah, and I have kissed on nights out in front of people just to win them out. Is that? Is that weird, just like with tongue, though. I'm not listen, I'm not bitch. Yes, so, no, Homo does. Who was question was at last? It was Alex's answer. So it will be Alice's question. Yes, Tom, message me your answer please. Alex. what is Tom's least favorite food? Of the same question, same one again, the same one again, but he changed the now, then quite well, fuck the listener. I've only got a couple of questions, you little tarts guys. I don't like there's it's not a huge amount of foods that I really like. Actively. Hey, like, I've got a fucking think about this. So okay, okay, okay, you get one in mind, because I had to do that because I'll Li fucking anything. There's just a fair and you a very slight put you down when it comes to food. Yeah, don't get me wrong, like I'll still eat a Keywi. It just hurts me to do it. Okay, Tom's message me the answer. He said he's got questions about the answer, but it's messaged me. Okay, right, so he's said when he was answering for mine, he said Brussels Sprout, and I don't know if that's a freudge and slip and it was. Actually that's he's answer. I'm it's all I've got to go on. I'm gonna yes, it's Brussel spray. No Point, I I'm afraid. So let me tell you what Tom's favorite food is, in the words of Tom. Some put the Yellow Fish, the yellow one. Is it Haddok? Maybe? I guess those are all individual messages like this. Wasn't one coherent center. This was just yellow fish. The yellow light is it had. Okay, so the scores on the door so far Alex to Tom One. Alex is the better friend so far. So, Alex, this is a question about Tom for you. Has Tom ever been fishing and caught a fish? Tom...

Message me your answer? Obviously not a yellowish because I'm going to put it back. I'm really confused because we've gone out of order. But it's okay, Alex could have this one. I'm going for Oh shit, we can swell. You just swap it. Just Hey, Tom, Alex Tom a minute ago. When it when he said when he said it to me, imagine he said it to you, but it was about me. It's about the other person, but I only okay, yeah, so has it. Has Alex ever caught a fish? I for some reason can't actually imagine a scenario where Alex would be fishing. So my answer is no, Alex has never caught a fish. They could. News is is scores in the doors are now tied, as Alex has never caught a fish and thus, when the apocalypse comes, will die. Never cool one. So never done I never done did a fish. There you go, asture. You just like on a website looking for questions, or you got some? I am I am making up questions and I have like five or six written down in case I run out of ideas. Okay, why you want to website googling? Right, how about how? No, I thought of a question. Cut this out. We'll just messaging me, you fucking idiot. What in order, Alex, because that's a lot of work. Yes, yes, Oh shit, all right, okay, now that's fine, Tom Hmm, was it your question last round, my sweet my baby boy, because Alex has never been fishing, as he said. Yeah, Alex, I'm not. I can't use the one that Alex is just fucking sent me because he obviously knows it. I don't know it. No, no, I promise, I don't know it. I just know that if you're really fucking arn't well, I'll come back. Forget about it. Would Tom Rather have listen, I know what I'm doing. Would tom rather have eggs for breakfast or pancakes for breakfast? Tom Message me your answer. Pancakes. I'm just going I'm going with my gut when it comes to Tommy, and I feel like a pancake is a more feeling. That's pretty where there. I would purse eggs are a little bit Yucky. Sometimes ex can be good, but you have to get on the right day. The good news is, Alex, the score is now three for you, as Tom Message me, just saying, big pancake energy. I love it's points if the aunt, the message you send me with your answer on makes me laugh. So just to clarify. Okay, now it's Tom's question about Alex. does Alex prefer a set menu at a restaurant or a buffet? I'm firing from the HIP here. Buffet. Okay, score is three. Three. Alex loves a buffet, and I probably would have guessed it exact I thought that you might. I'm a big man, okay, but I'm a big man. A lot of room inside of this boy for snacks. I've said, I'm going to get points for laughter because you guys fucking know me. So it's now a question, is it? It's Alex about Tom. Now, God, this is confusing, isn't it not? Really, you just do one and then and then ask you just do the other one. Well, I hadn't thought about it before and I had this bit in mine like three weeks ago and I had it really well planned out, but I forgot about until now. It's well, Tom, is it Tom? About Alex? About Tom Alex? It does have Tom. Yes, beppy on my Hooka Cola, sorry, Mahoka Tola, Mahoka, Mahoka Tola. Thank you. What, as in does it? which which now and does which name? Does he prefer? Which Fizzy Brown Bev? Which Delicious Fizzy Brown Bevy? Does this man pour down his gull it on the regular? See, I know he's got personal ties to the big the big red brand, on the basis of his employment there, but I also know Tom to not love the corporations and I think coax the bigger ones. Familiar. Top of you message me Your Auntie at you filthy time. Are you trying to make me laugh? That he's a nice typing for a while now, so this could be a doozy. Oh, I've figured it better. Betty's blue and he loves blue. Are you saying Beppy Alex? I'm going to say Betty, but I think it's wrong. I'm taking coca bro I used to work there, but it's my fab which didn't did like the fact that he opened with other fucking wrunched him. In the micro episode, he literally fucking gets one. Hi. It's me, Alex, you big dummy, your host, but not right now, not actively, just scories. For Three Alex has had one point for making me laugh. Tom Has had three correct so so far you're both equally good friends, but Alex has made me laugh at it. What are you telling me? That my that my haddock message to shit. Now I'm gonna give you a point for Haddock. Actually, that did fucking get yellow fish. That was rank you. Let's give you the point. Great, well reminded.

We've retcon the quiz. Yeah, let's have the fucking a podcast host here, mother liquor Tom. Yes, what do you think the most complicated thing Alex has ever tried to cook is, because I know a man that could bother a salad but also can do a real meansteak. So what's the most complex meal? Alex Pea's message me your answer. Bonus points are awarded if it's funny. I'm well aware that not only is Alex a man who's had a hello fresh or Augusto order once or twice, but I also know that he's a man that enjoys to cook a cook a dish. Do Love to go. So I don't think we're talking just like I don't know if we're talking just like a roast dinner or whether he's tried like Crem rule at from scratch, or whether we're all there'll be no hints, you know. I will tell you that that his message did get me laughing, but I didn't audibly laugh. So I don't think I'll be giving the point I internally. I did. I did give a little snore internally, but I didn't giggle at it. So I won't be no way at editor. Play back the tape. Did Ashley Laughs? Let's get a quick pull it. Run that back. All Right, there freesat sea factor right on that guy by the back of here, the spot with the right equipment. The image be enlarged in shop side. Is Enhancement program clear that up any no, let's answer enhance section a six. Enhance the detail and have to enhance release it to my screen. has to reflection in your eyelets run this through video enhancement enhances. I've been working on this. Reflection, someone's reflection, reflection. There's a reflection of the man's face reflection, reflection. Zoom in on the mirror. You can see a reflection. Okay, has image from hands. Can you hands it? endances? Can hold on. Second all handsome. Zoom in on the doorstep. Wait, stop, stop, close it rotate as seventy five. Stop. Go back to the part about the door again. Got Any image and Hanswer like a bit man the prep. See this of where at stave the yeah, I can find off the great combination of He's taking to the next level. I can use them to large the ex and hand for use and enhance. Now we're in the present, though, and I'm not. I don't know. Cool. If no, no, if I if I did laugh at the exact moment that message arrived, and you'll know because my phone will vibrated. I will record an apology and it will be three minutes long about the wrongness and shooting quiz, and that will be cut in right now. or it won't, so I think, but it will have. This is the most tricky dish did I do? What tricky dish? Did you do? A crawn risotto? First of all, fucking weak sauce with the prawn has also, okay, I'm not older points, okay, but we're taking the answer. Prawn Jumbalaya up. Alex messages me saying big, nasty, horrible croissant. I did a accidentally did a loaf. Fuck, I knew. I knew that as well, which is really I tried to make quassans and like all the fuck there's so I've never done dough before, but I made dough for a scratch and you've got to like fold it, but as you fold it, you've got to put like a bit of butter in it, as like as a sandwich, and you've got to put that in the fridge, flatten it out again, make it big, put another layer of butter in it and you supposed to like keep going, keep going, keep going. He's like laminating butter in it, but my butter kept melting, it just incorporating with the dough. So I just, I just, I just made twelve loafs of bread. Speaking of that, ask me what I had for tea this evening. Twelve class on twelve tons of time. Hey, ash didn't say. Guess. I said ask zero points for SASSAGE. It'd be real means. We'll go one more touch. We'll go one more time. Hey Boys, guess what I had for...

...tea? No, no, ask me, ask me not. I think I was a spa bowl. What did you make for dinner? Thank you actually for asking. I had I had twelve go balls. These are express with a garlic dip. That's a good thing. You poor think. That's all I had. Yesterday for dinner. I had one. I had a cheeseburger and one chicken nugget. That's what did you us today. was too excited by car PS to dimension. I can't right. So my next question is is it's to Alex, about our friend, who's the host of the podcast? Your segments over Sha my still hopes to the podcast as fume gus gone. Who Won't? You'RE gonna be disappointed because Tom, Alex, if I laughed at the croissant thing, you'll have one. It would have been five for Tom if I didn't laugh. It's all high. Oh, okay, so maybe we do this. Oh well, well, we'll just will record some now. Well done, may joint effort. I can't believe, though. was that close, neck and neck all the way through. Caught really like a friendship. Can we have one where you all had Tom? I'm a better friend, you fat nerd cool the question I messaged ash too for him to ask to us about was to list all of the vehicles we've owned in order. Shall we record like a bit now that we drop in at the end of Ashley segment, telling everybody to listen to the end of the episode so that they can enjoy the car picks? I bet that's really boring radio. Yeah, yes, I believe it will be as well. So who wants to do that? Just somebody, do it quickly. Okay, listeners, if you are hearing this, it means that you stuck around right until the end. No, and he like what? No, no, the end of your initial segment. Our guys, you just listen to usk these initial the the bit of Ashley Segment that we did. We did another one and it was probably quite boring. We spoke about cars for a while. Stick around the end of the show to torch yourself through that. Well done. You did it, Alex, Alex, you did it. I'm so proud. I'm not host anymore. Somebody get me out of this fucking podcast. Let's just let's just go to the money train, shall we? Shoo Choo, my fuck, welcome to the money train, everybody. It's another segment between segments, but this one is to do with stuff, right. It's yeah, it's got stuff, it's got things. It was spotify wrapped this week for the Year of two thousand and twenty one, the crap, garbage year that this year's been. So I wanted to shout out a few people that listened to my podcast, because this is my podcast. But yeah, and set and it was their most listened podcast on the show. So I'm going to say some people to these are number one super fans, are super, super big fans. So my friend Ashley Bulldog Smith, Not Ashley Hall, as she prom I don't think I can be included. Actually, bulldock Smith, my cousin Hell Em Quinn, and also Megan Tompkins, all of those three people. Bless up, Megan. Yes, thank you. Yeah, all of the all of those guys. Yeah, they they let me know that the thirty three percent majority was their most listen to podcast and that's fucking cool. So thank you very much, guys. I would like to thank my sweet, lovely friend Jack. I'm not going to do surnames. Fucking then pay me Jack. He do. He done a podcast listening. Hello Jack, thank you for listen thanks for letting Jack. We've also got Harry. Thank you for listening to the PODCAST. Harry. Thanks are very nice name. Thanks me, Harry. We hurry, Harry, just sorry, just hurry, all right, mate. No, no, just wait, hurry. Thank you, mate. Thanks for learning Tom Use your playstation. Controller's really good and I didn't come on it. I did, but they weren't like stuff news. Next up and last on the docket for our number our seventh number one Super Fan. It's merely I'll pick up me. Thanks. Thanks, podcast, merely for listening about podcast. Thank Milly Millie, that podcast pod, Millie. Thank you. Thank you for the listening. Thanks. That's been a money train. Ever. Was...

...who was way good? Remind me, because it's what you gooch, the one that's as are. Oh, yeah, it's what a Google definitely wasn't a number one super fan. Yeah, this's no, but she is. She is sweaty cooch with is a friend of Alex, Alex's and mine mine, a back from our school days. No, back, back from our school days. I'm not sure that you've met her, but it's okay. Deserve friendship. What the fuck. Yeah, I just don't think you know her from school. Because you didn't go to our school. You don't need to, though. I don't worry about it. All right. Just what? Yeah, her name is cadine. I'm not she left us a nice review. Is Much better. Thank you very much. This has been a chaotic money train. Shall we leave it? Let's get off this train. I think what just happened really really if we think about it in the context of the scene we just set up, is we boarded a train at a platform, the train didn't go anywhere and then we got off the same platform. Explain our group as people agree a great shall I to be host now? Thomas, do it, I'll do it. Band we've been doing it. We've been doing this podcast for so long, so I will now rip off the band aid of host ship and give it to myself. I guess put the cheat. This podcast episode is an important one because this is going to be the last episode that I record whilst living in the big smokestack forward slash coastal town of Lewisham, which is in London. It's the last one, so last one I'm going to be recording here and of an era we don't have to edit out police sirens from your recordings anymore time. There are listening to people getting stabbed to death in the background, gun shots all the time. Well, funnily enough, that is what my segment is about today. I thought I would just tell you some of the strangest things that I ever done so whilst I lived in London. How about that? I really like that. I'd like that. Yeah, it's please, just as like a like a last Hurrah, or I'm gonna get tucked in for storytime with Talma. Yeah, okay, are you ready for my first one? I love this one. Yeah, I saw a man asleep in a child's car chair under a bridge. That one's a Hiku. Keep going. That's a Hiku, I think in places he s L forward wept. I don't know, I was that just wasn't comedy or anything really. I saw a man's sleep under the bridge. He lay do it doesn't matter. I forgot the word I was looking for. Poetry is hard, mate. I'd never I'd never tried starbent. Next, okay, so yeah, that was that was one thing that I saw. My next like that. My next one there was a halfeat and sandwich on a seat on the tube. That stop. There was this like a subway sandwich, or was this like crime? was what can't explain to me. Triangle, somebody, so somebody loves it's a bag lunch and someone gave up Fred's dries. Buck, I'm out. Can't be honest. The fucking seat when you just crunch it along and you you teeth get worn out. So you just got fucks like give up. He's gonna get on the train tomorrow. It's a borrow, but it ever safety being someone's taken by Sandwich. What the fuck? Things though, the shoot, the tube is an odd it's an old fucking place. I'm certain as well that I've seen just like a stray prawn on a seat as well, just just just and prawn. He's on his way to work, you fucking bigot. The motives question. She paid for his tickets all, just climb up. Can't sit next to him, though, because he's really shell fish. He doesn't share his seats. Oh No, Ashley successfully killed that one. I love you both very much. Great Wonderful Behavior. These next these...

...next two, are going to be quite depressing, so I might just get them over and done with quite quickly. Get them out of the waiter. A man who was waiting for the train next to me whilst I was, you know, about to begin my morning commute to work, and so it would have been at a roundabout quart to eight in the morning, HMM, and just just necking straight vodka before he got on the train. Just are. He's on his way to work. Tom He's paid for his ticket. It's got an oyster car Tup. I gotta say, without the context it is not as good as it's good. God, just copy past jokes barely. That's my entire committed career. What was Tom what was he where it? Was it like suit and tie, or was this man just it's like tracker DACs. No, so I would imagine. I imagine he was wearing smartish clothes underneath the jacket that he was wearing, because he was wearing trousers and like black shoes, shoes, if you know what I mean, like dress shoes kind of thing, but from he's always waiting office, but from within his jacket. So he yeah, he literally unsipped his jacket and from inside of his jacket pulled not like a not a travel bottle of vodka, but like you know, the sort of travel bottle like for if you get thirsty. Yeah, it's one of those likes with you know, you get the big bottles of vodka and then you get the small ones that are sort of square in shaped. You know what I'm talking about? The flat, yeah, like the flat of US foot, but they're designed to go into the inside pocket the business cut suit. So yeah, that's fine. That and yeah, exactly. And Yeah, so proof of concepts. It works. Maybe it was just water and he was just doing it to fuck with people. Oh, maybe he was. It was a good prank. If that was the case, Dick and dom didn't pop out to say that I'd been I'd been pranked. So I think it was something you've been done by the patrol. Yeah, no, the the Ninja's came. The next oppressing one was that, on a snowy evening last year, a man was chased down my street by a man with a machete. That that happened on a street I lived on. The man with the Muchette, he was he was ever so upset because he was on his way to work earlier in the day, but they put a sandwich down for two minutes and a Dang prawl nicked it. So he got to work super angry, super pissed off, argument with the boss. Boss fired him. He's now pissed up, hungry, sleepy, takes a NAP under a bridge in a babe there for absolutely cristagious. No, stop it, stop laughing. It wasn't a laugh about but no, for dead, pretend I didn't say it. I think. I think. I think that, Alex, your jokes, your comedy. You're really shrimping along here, is that? What was that supposed to be like? That was a play on words, but I don't know what you started with, like limping along. Okay, I mean, yeah, it's there, is it? Yeah, but you've explained the joke. It's good now. Yeah, exactly. Yeahs less effective if you've got to point them out. What's the next one that I've got? and Oh, yeah, so he's down by the way, because if you have oh yeah, I know, one memory from London. Antics. Yeah, no, I wrote, I wrote them down. I wanted to. I wanted to ensure that I remembered them all. And a a man riding a moped, not me, was being chased by a police officer who was on a motorcycle and they were doing many laps around the sort of like three streets that I lived near, and the moped assailant thought he was going to be really smart and cut through a park that had like those ballards like blocking entrance from the road to the pavement. But what he neglected to sort of think about was that the policeman was on a motorbike to yeah, what you've done? That really what he did was he just made the chase a bit more spicy, less spicy, because, like a mope's not going to do as well on flat round another park. Yeah, bike is Shawnette's just mixing it up. It just he just got bored. Well, yeah, I thought that one was cool though, definitely, but you should have played the Benny Hill theme tune on a speaker from that your balcony. I didn't want to get involved in case that wanted to kill me. I think you'd struggle from your high floor. You're...

...not not ground level flat. Maybe maybe another cool story about that flat as well. I didn't actually write this one down. This isn't sort of a comment on the state of society. There were just a number of homeless people that would live in the stairwells of my building, and that's not a homeless person them. That's down. They got home. It's got a house, but very, very regularly they would urinate and make a lot of mess, and obviously that wasn't the nicest thing in the world. But they were actually really, really polite and very like regularly, very regular offered me various amounts of class a narcotics. Oh, good morning, Mr Hutchinson. Apologies, I do appear to have defecated in the Stirwell, do have friends day at the office anyway, Turchy bars, mind yourself there, Mr Hutchinson. My ambm is on the floor. I really I knew that Alex would enjoy ambm like nothing else. That will squeezy me, sir. Sorry, don't get a just slot in it, just muster blast my cheeks clean off. I must loosen the stool, if you will. I say, sir. Have you any paper? Have you half a sandwich, but I may borrow okay, so, so weird. A lady. It's very strange. This what this one's going to baffle you guys. A lady told me off in my local park that, by the way, it belongs to the building that I live in, for riding your mopen for a lady told me off in a park because my dogs scared her whilst she was doing a Piss in a Bush. In fairness, listen, number ones are fine. You can number one in the Bush if you need to. Lady, as we all know, you save number two is for Haleways, sneaky Bush. Joey's just there. Hallo, you've got some petty outside that. Huh, I do that as well. We're the same. You're a very large dog. That's what confuse me, because she was she was cross at my sweet hairy son trying to do exactly what she was doing. He just wanted to Piss. Oh, this is the Bush for pissing in. This is this park's Pish Piss bushish Bush, pish Bush. been some here, here, here, a weakness. You know, dogs, we on things to mark their territory. Yeah, Joey was jus such. This is my put. Definitely, this one's mine. I got thistle in that Bush and then it was essentially just the joey and this woman just going dont me know, me pissing. I have this one now. This is this one belongs to me. I'M gonna go back when you guys move away and Piss in that Bush. And then I'll have owner ship forever, because Jerry doesn't live there anymore. I love that. No, he won't, he won't really and that. My next story is another lady getting cross at me. Huh, so I'd NIP to test goes. Really, do you sexually assault her as well while trying to do a titanic? Now? I did. I did. It's actually a long I so I had. I popped into Testcos I was in a rush. I needed to pick up some stuff because we were, I was late for going somewhere. Ran Into TESCO's, got my stuff, I'm on the way out and a very, very kind looking soul reached out to me and said, I I'm really sorry, do you have any change, and I very honestly emptied my pockets. I'm really sorry, I don't have any change on me. And she said would you be able to get me some food, and I said I can, I can put off whatever plans I have to to help somebody get a bite to eat. Yes, of course, I'll run back in. What do you want? You want a sandwich, Dan like you know. What do you want to drink? And I get you anything. Yeah, I'll go and grab you some food. And the kind lady sort of switch tactics then and said that she specifically wanted a fish and chips. Okay, that's warm meal. You've move for so many reasons. Yeah, I said to her, I don't. I don't think test gooes will have a fish and chip for you. So I'm not sure what you want me to do. And she said, Oh, well, just round the corner a little bit there's a fish and chip shop. So would you go with me to the fish and chip shop and buy me a fish and chips, sir and and I said to her, I wouldn't. Be Honest,...

I'm in a rush and I need to go so I can get you something to eat from TESCO's so that you've got a meal, because I want to help, but I don't really have the time to go and wander over to a fishing chip shop to get you fish and chips. It's not a case of me not wanting to help. They don't have the time. Now it's us over that you're an awful person. Well, yeah, she thought so as well, and she told me to fuck clean off. She no longer want to she's just they're hungry and angry because you're a selfish, pretty insensitive joke, but I want to make it. This is a really insensitive one. We might have to remove it. But literally, beggars can't be choosers. that. No, I don't think that's insensitive at all. At that point you should have turned around and said, I don't want to, I don't want to be that guy, my love, but begards, Beau. See, this is the thing, though. You're being a chooser, but also I actually, I actually hadn't taken choice away from her. All I had said is just that, please narrow your parameters to the things that are inside of testcos this within these walls, that I will purchase your scrummy snack. Yes, your menu and is. Yeah, and TESCO, just rip up your coat and underneath you're full on like Tuxedo waiters outfit. All you may have, you, all you may have, is what is on Tessaca as men. You, okay, yes, not deviate from the set menu, not in any way. Now, you could have got a bag of frozen chips, that bitch, fucking orbit. I love that, though. Have you ever had it happened as I asked somebody to buy but I was what I worry, Youngman, I asked somebody to go into a shop and buy me some cigarettes and they went in they bought me twenty sausages. There were twenty Richmond, which is a grand I've done that to somebody and I think that's where you've heard that from. Richmond. I Love Twenty Richmond because, yeah, you fucking and other that tour Tom, you could should put the twenty fags this, where you go love such ever, some Moreish, which means they come from the Moor's right. Yes, Tom, addictive comes from pringles, pringles, notoriously. I I can't believe you beat me to Prinky. It's your pot. You can't stop. pringles are the heroin of a snack world and somebody else's Fera rushes. Yeah, that's terrible as well, you know, because you sneak one, but you're like no, not, like what up too? Yeah, well, I'm not know. He's three and then the box is going like they're gonna notice. They definitely notice six. That's the life, like the line of how polite they have to be before they could mention. Hey, did you eat six of my Ferrara? Fill you out on five. But she's where they draw the fucking line. Five and you lick the SAE. Get there you are. You're a lad across the line, your man, you'd be forgetful. I'm not over the fucking Boister kind think I'm still thinking about it. It's in my head. We did a podcast, guys. Yeah, fucking stupid one time. There isn't isn't there an urban frictionary left to do? Or are we? Are We ever gone? We over shot. I think this rounds it with the end. We're just at the end, the end. This is just how we do it now. Well, fuck, thanks for listening, I guess. Yes, Ladies and gentlemen, thank you all ever so much. Everybody that got in touch with their two thousand and twenty one rap spotify updates. Let us know that we are the most listen to podcast. Sincerely, it does make us very, very it's very true that you enjoy listening to it, because we very much enjoy making it. So thank you a great but this, this has been a podcast and I have been your host, Alex Springthelpe, I am also your post, just a shrimp on a train, Ashley whole, your post, but post. I did that and I fucking knew I was gonna call me actually actually look like a fence has got a post, like when you send mail, when you send mail to someone, Ashley The Post. I've Ste I've stopped recording, I've left. I've been your host, Tom Hutchinson. Love you very much. Thank you for listening. Thank you all so much for listening. See you all next week. Bye, bye, bye. Welcome to the after this show bonus content. It's Nash. There's apology and also our Saxon Times ask getting each other's cars, but that last bit as unedited. loon. Hi, guys, it's actually your host with the most who has made the most mistakes. I'd like to read now to you and apology that I think, I think means something to us all, about my behavior during the quiz, where I...

...said to Alex that if I was wrong I would give him an apology speech about the score. Alex would have won had it not been for my interference. And so here I begin. First, I want to say to all of you that, as you might imagine, I've been done quite a journey these last few weeks to get to the end of this, to the rock modern truth of where I am and where we all are. I agree with those who have said that in my first statement after I testified, I was not contrite enough. I don't think there was a fancy way to say that I've sinned. is important to me that everybody who's been hit the sorrow I feel this genuine first and foremost my family, my friends, my staff, my cabinet, Alexander Springthorpe and his family, and the American people. I have asked all for their forgiveness, but I believe that be to be forgiven, more than sorrow is required. At least two more things. First, genuine repentance, a determination to change, to repair breaches of my own making. I have repented. Second, what my Bible would call a broken spirit and understanding that I must have God's help to be the person that I want to be, a willingness to give the very forgiveness I seek, a renunciation of pride and anger, which cloud judgment and lead people to excuse and compare and blame and complain. Basically, Alex I'm sorry for my behavior during the quiz. You are the winner, the greatest and Best Lord of all quizzers, Alexander Spring thought or so. Yeah, I did laugh at the Y. I laughed at the message I'm sorry, guys. And now it's the bit that is the car one. Do we have time for for Alex to try and list every vehicle times had? Can we have that as a bonus round? Then can we have the vice versa, because Alex has had some Du Yeah, I'm not going name all of Alex's. Well, you want to save that the next time. We just quick, because I do want to do it again. I do like it. No, we could do it right now and we can put it on medium mode if we exclude motorcycles. Okay, I'll say I know two of your I know two of your bikes, though, so I might be able to do it. You don't know the other seven, though. He's a lot of cool, cool, cool, cool, cool cool. Okay, yeah, that's fine. Jordan. Are we doing this now, or is this bonus content? Look about me, laughing at croissant. This is the time brace. I'm either doubling down my victory or this is the die. Right, whichever one of you. Okay, most of vehicles right out of so the percentages. Let's say you've had ten vehicles. If you get eight right, that's eighty per cent. Whichever you have, you get the highest percentage of vehicles owned. Oh, we'll get the win. Okay, then, what I'm going to try and do is I'm going to try and name as many as I can. I know that Alex has had a bandit. I know that he's had a Honda CBR. Yep, yeah, well done, and Nisson Micra. Yeah, Uh Huh, I know I've got the Astra, the vaux or Astra. YEA, not, well, not an Astra, but no, Oh no, but I'm taking the Raban. The RABAN, Tom Thought you knew the Red Barn, the red barge. I don't think we could accept Red Barghie was a which was a what God, it was an Astra, I'll tell you that much. Funds of the show now and got out beside me, fucking. Oh my God, what was it? It was a horrible big red penis insignia. Okay, well, and then, I guess, are we counting the brand new vehicle? I was that's got a new cat. Oh, sorry, if I got a new I've got a new one. You could throw that one if you wanted to. You said you did. It's a it's a Ford. Fuck, I don't think it's a Monday. You got a Ford. fucking fuck. Monday, O. Monday. Yeah, I did get capitals, because it did get a four foot Monday. That's all the one that that I think. That's where where you missed out Tommy on the long Geo wraptor one two five, the ybr one two five. That's all the motorcycles. I had a per joe two thousand and six with a one point follow petrol, ungine, electric, some roof and a hundred and fortyzero miles of the clock and my Coursa. You missed out my courser, the first one I actually was allowed to drive, whereas I don't remember that. Tom had an NSR one two five and RS one two five. A whole Honder that Nasi Alex. I've forgotten it now ours Yep. What was his my ped? What his money? But it was a Honda. The are X is the Yam. I don't know that. I don't know that it was a Honda something. I'm assuming it like Honders. Honda's really, really close, but it's an it's a relatively uncommon moped.

I won't know if you get it. As you know, I have a Honder. My moped was no, my moped was a Hondre, but I'm saying it's it's uncommon. Okay, it's not. I won't get home and the pad. Okay, I'm sure at one point he had a Perjo one hundred and six. I think six, not sure. No, Volkswagon Polo, loopo, Polo, that Polo, that was his as instead of the one of six. Voxwagon Polo, Honda Civic, season, Timmy's car. That one, Tim Timmy car, Timmy Civic Tivot. You kind of get this energy from Tom but he had a white one series, one series energy, big one, serious energy from Thomas in the corner. Oh, I liked that car until it started not working anymore. fucking touring, having my most left wind friend accusing my second most left story. It's the highlight of my podcast. Thank you so much, Alex. you've done guess it. Can I can we move away of coming here? I believe he now. I believe he now has access to an Ashtra. Okay, so you missed so very many and got so very many wrong. Never owned it. I've never owned a persio and I've never owned a Volkswagen, but you have, though. I know that you have. It was Andrew. No, wasn't his car, though. So that's so, that's Andrew is not mine the list. I'm sure you had it after Andrea, though, there was a plan for me to have it, and then at now that then I didn't our our guess the bit I was remembering them. Was the plan near mind? Yeah, the plan. Yeah. And so the modeped that I had was a Honder xaight rs and it was a very attrall I had, I would thought, was close then. Yeah, exactly, so close. And I had a courser as well, old model courser. Did. Then I had a random agan, one of my most favoritest cars I've ever had. MMM, surprisingly, I then got a civic, but it was the really, really small old model civic, you know with the weird stick. Does that ring a bell where it's like, Oh, the dashboard? Yeah, the round boy, maybe, NB. Yeah, yeah, no, the this that that. It was a curvy issue civic. Yes, and then daddy gave me the big too late, a diesel civic. I was as a tool a toms near too seone new cars bigger than that. If you got a new car, wow, don't mention rug on new cast two five. Yeah. So then then I got the the one series. So I don't know how many got right. You got the two motorbicles right. Will be checking answers now. So, Alex, Hmm, I need you to confirm bandit. Yes, Honder, CBR, yes, any, counting it once because he only said it once, but I'm fairly sure you had four of them. Yeah, Michael at the Michael, then sound, sorry, and then an Astra. HMM. No, no ASTRAS. No astras in this bitch. The insignia, which I know you had because it was camouflage as a big Mea, damn, and the one Dayo, which we know you have. Yeah, Tom, if you can confirm for me, and N SR, Yep, and Rs Yep, a Sofoca, oh, sorry, Servioc, Yep. Well, I one series. Yep, makes sense. And an Astra. Yeah, you own the as I said, you have access to. No, no, sir. Do you own the ashes at your car? No, not in any way, shape or form. No afraid. Scores on the doors. A fish. Alex, you got one, two, three bore vehicles. Correct. Tom, you got one, two, three, four five. Yeah, for carbon emissions, whoo. Yeah, I.

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